Family Concerns

Disciplining your child is never easy. You probably know from experience and mistakes how vital it is to be consistent, firm and to always follow through with designated disciplinary consequences. But when there are two parents involved, it’s crucial they are both on the same page and apply discipline consistently irrespecrive of marital status.

Parents should agree on how to discipline their children. To become reliable to children, both parents must be consistent in dealing with similar situations. In a situation where the parents are separated or divorced, disagreeing with each other over upbringing can create a confusing situation for children. They should make a determined effort to keep their child’s best interests at heart and sit down with their child and line out the rules and expectations and the consequences for violating those rules. Both should agree that the intended discipline is fair, and apply it consistently in a firm yet fair manner in each household.

Also, if there are disagreements regarding discipline or other parenting issues, they are best resolved when the child is not present. If the child senses discord, they may attempt to manipulate the situation to their advantage.

When teaching good behavior, parents have to “practice what they preach.” Children learn values and beliefs more by the examples adults set than by verbal instructions. Screaming at a child to be quiet or paddling a child for hitting is hypocritical and ineffective. Decide what is important and what parental response to use to teach your child. It would be more effective to calmly tell your child to be quiet or use “time-out” when a child is physically aggressive.

And remember what works now may not work later down the road. Situations may dictate a different approach, and time and maturity may demand a child’s rule be modified or abolished altogether. Sometimes your common sense will help you decide when bedtime rules should be altered or table manners relaxed. Some rules will be the same, others will be modified or abolished, and new ones will be introduced. But regardless of the situation, parents should always present a unified front and work [spin[with each other|together[/spin] and not against each other in providing effective discipline for their child.

Potty training is frequently a stage of childhood development that many parents dread. As with discipline it is vital that a consistent approach is adopted. Both parents, and anyone else involved in caring for your child must follow the same toilet training regime. To do otherwise simply confuses the toddler. And potty training will take longer and be more stressful.

Learn more about the best toilet training programs
tips on potty training
tips on potty training
potty training boys

Thumb sucking is a concern lots of parents have. Toddlers suck their thumbs because it’s comforting and calming. It’s probably something they did before they were born and revert back to it when they are nervous, agitated, scared or feeling poorly. They may also use it to lull themselves back to sleep in the middle of the night.

Parents shouldn’t concern themselves unless it continues after the age their permanent teeth start to appear, around six years old. Experts say that it’s the intensity of the thumb sucking and the tongue’s thrust that deforms teeth and makes braces necessary later. Kids who rest their thumb passively in their mouth are less likely to have difficulty than children who suck aggressively. If you’re concerned, closely monitor your son or daughter and analyze their technique. If they appear to be sucking strongly, you may want to start curbing their habit.

Punishing or nagging your son or daughter to stop won’t help because it’s usually an automatic response. Attempting to curb it by putting an elastic bandage on their thumb or another method will seem like an unjust punishment, especially as they indulge in the habit for comfort and security.

Try to wait it out. Kids usually give up thumb-sucking when they’ve found other ways to calm and comfort themselves. Think about offering them other alternatives to comfort themselves such as a soft blanket or lullaby toy.

The key is to notice when and where they are likely to suck their thumbs and offer an alternative. If it happens while they are tired, try giving more naps. If they suck their thumb often while watching television, try to distract them with a toy that will keep their hands occupied.

Older children may need gentle reminders to curtail thumb sucking while in public, and praise should be given freely when the child finds and uses an acceptable alternative. Your child’s pediatric dentist can offer other suggestions for helping your son or daughter kick the thumb sucking habit.

If there is one stage of toddler development that seems to fill many parents with dread then it has to be potty training. I think this originates from our own parents and grandparents telling us tales of woe about their own experiences of potty training their children. But that was ages ago and knowledge about child development has grown dramatically. That means that your experience of potty training can be very different from that of your mother or grandmother. The key is to follow a reputable potty training program. And that actually starts well before you introduce your child to a potty. Check out the following articles for further advice
potty training boys
potty training tips
potty training tips
And the guidance applies equally well whether you are potty training a boy or girl.

You are not a perfect parent, and your toddler is certainly not the perfect child. We can’t get it right all the time. But if you are having difficulty toilet training your toddler it could be that you are making some or all of the following mistakes.

Mistake 1:
We all live such busy lives. And many of us can only survive by having a timetable. But can you really slot toilet training into that schedule at a time when it’s convenient to you?. Well, yes you can, if your toddler is ready to be potty trained. By that I mean he or she physically and emotionally able to cope with being potty trained But if you begin toilet training before your child is ready than you are asking for trouble and frustration. Not just for you but also for your child. So, whilst it is nice to potty train in the summer or before your toddler starts nursery it is your child’s development that has to dictate the timing.

Mistake 2
When you sit your toddler on a potty it is oh so tempting to have them sit there until they do something. You think that will mean they are much less likely to have an accident. But sitting on a cold plastic potty is not the most comfortable thing in the world. And in any case your toddler is likely to get bored unless you read them a story or give them a toy or picture book. You must let your child get up from the potty when they feel it’s getting uncomfortable even if there has been no action. Otherwise you risk your toddler developing a negative association with the potty.

Mistake 3
Because you want to avoid accidents it is very easy to be saying “do you need to go on the potty” every five minutes or so. To put it bluntly that’s nagging. It’s likely to drive all those around you to distraction. The occasional prompt is all that is required.

Mistake 4
Much as we would all like to be cool and calm parent all the time we have to acknowledge that we are not superwoman, or superman. Whilst it is stating the obvious that you must never shout at your toddler, it is important to try and watch your non verbal messages. So much of communication is non verbal such as the tone of your voice. So whilst loading up the washing machine with soiled clothes and cleaning up after an accident is not much fun you must reassure your child that you still love them and that you know that soon they will be able to wee and poo in the potty.

For more advice on toilet training a toddler do check out these articles
potty training toddlers
potty training tips
potty training little boys
The advice applies equally whether it is a little girl or little boy you want to toilet train.

Nowadays, baby shower etiquette has evolved from a set rules and procedures to a few flexible guidelines from which to base the structure of your shower on. Although there are no specific rules on how to host your baby shower, there are some basic rules of thumb that will help you have an amazing shower that will be comfortable and enjoyable for you and your guests. This bit of advice will answer all of the questions that you may have in mind and will address the issues at hand that matter when planning a baby shower. There is more to know than just shopping for the unique gift babies will love.

Who should host the baby shower?

Years ago, the tradition was for non-related friends or co-workers to host the celebration . However, today, many expectant mothers like for their own mothers and sisters to plan and host the event. The decision of who should host of the shower is entirely up to you. In today’s society, anyone from the mommy’s sister, to her mom, to her best friend, to her co-worker, is acceptable . There is no right or wrong host. The important part here is that whoever decides to host the baby shower be close to the mother and know her very well, in order to plan and execute the event according to her taste and ideals . The provider of the baby shower is more likely to know what the mom would prefer in the way of baby personalized gifts because she will undoubtedly know the new baby’s name, if it has been chosen.

When is it appropriate to have the baby shower?

Typically, a baby shower is held about one to two months before the newborn’s due date. This is a good time because the mother will know the gender of the baby by this date, and it will be easier to shop for things knowing if the baby will be a boy or a girl. One or two months in advance of the baby’s birth date also gives the mother time to buy the items that she did not receive or that she is missing, before the baby’s arrival. Some people opt to have the shower a few weeks after the baby is born. This is also perfectly acceptable, and entirely up to you.

Where should the baby shower take place?

Depending on the number of guests , hosts can choose to have the shower at a house, a restaurant, or a banquet hall. The location of the baby shower is the host’s decision, and is dependant on the finances , too. When choosing the place for the celebration, consider the size of your audience, the mommy’s preferences, and the total costs.

Can I invite men to the baby shower?

Whether you decide to have an all-woman baby shower or a co-ed baby shower is up to you. Years ago, most women had women-only showers, but today, co-ed baby showers have become increasingly popular . This gives the daddy-to-be, his friends, and male members of the family a chance to attend in the celebration.

When considering details about the baby shower, it is critical to cater to the mommy-to-be and her preferences. There are no set do’s and don’ts in today’s society. More and more taboos have been broken, and many things have become appropriate and acceptable, as long as the expectant parents are happy with the celebration. One thing that is becoming more and more apparent is many of the participants are wanting to show up with the most unique practical baby gift baskets.

How do you name your child? Do you call a family powwow, sit down with Cross century pens and a sheaf of papers, scrawl out possible names for the little one, and then vote over the names that sounds nicest?

Naming Children

In the old days, child-naming was simpler. Parents did not have to tick names off a list using their Cross pens. Expectant parents either named children after a grandparent, aunt, or uncle, or bestowed them with names that seemed to describe them best - think Indian names like Little Foot, Big Rock, and Strong as the Wind. There was no elaborate fuss over whom the child should be named after.

Odd and Odder

Today, parents put much thought into their children’s names. Thanks to celebrities’ penchant for picking out bizarre names, the rest of humanity stranger by the minute.

More recently, a couple in New Zealand lost custody of their daughter when they named her Talula Does the Hula from Hawaii. A family court judge gave the order after it was discovered the child felt so humiliated by the name she refused to share it with her friends. Rather than admit her parents had named her Talula Does the Hula from Hawaii, the little girl claimed her name is K.

Quirky Is Not Always Criminal

In his ruling, the judge said parents should not give their offspring strange names as this exposes them to ridicule by their peers. He pointed out poor judgment when it comes to names would only be a social disability and an unnecessary handicap to a child who, unwittingly, has to bear the burden of being called Talula Does the Hula from Hawaii. To demonstrate his point better, the judge gave a list of names that may be deemed bad for a child’s well-being, among them:

1. Yeah Detroit
2. Sex Fruit
3. Fish and Chips
4. Stallion
5. Keenan Got Lucy
6. Twisty Poi

Not all odd names are considered damaging to child psychology, though. As a matter of, in the same ruling, the judge also included names that, though strange, were allowed by the court, specifically:

1. Number 16 Bus Shelter
2. tragically, Violence
3. Midnight Chardonnay

This ruling brings to light one aspect of New Zealand legislation that is not like any in the world. Before parents can whip out a Cross pen set and register the quirky name of their child, they have to consider the law does not allow names that would cause offense to a reasonable person.

Does your child have a laptop or personal computer in their bedroom? If they are above a certain age I’d be surprised if you said no. It seems that these days children see it as their right to be able to go on the web in the privacy of their own space away from parents and away from any supervision. As computers have decreased in price I guess that we as parents are just as responsible, it’s oh so easy just to let them get on with it in their bedroom leaving us with time to ourselves. Most children start with the “look what I can do” stage where they want to show you everything they can do on a computer and then at around age 11 or 12 they move onto the “ALT+TAB” stage where everything online becomes secret or hidden. It’s then they “need” their own computer. So the question is do you have any idea what your kids are doing online?

I know my daughter completely loves 2 things about the internet. Only 2. Bebo and MSN Messenger. If you have a girl aged around 13 years old I imagine your daughter is similar. The trouble is that these 2 services are possibly some of the most dangerous internet activities that our children could enjoy. Bebo is well known as being the child’s social network of choice (despite having an age limit that should stop this from happening). If I know that, children know that, you can be sure as hell that there are plenty of paedophiles that know that as well! If your child has an open profile on Bebo, then they are revealing a lot of personal information to all and sundry. Birthdays, pictures, likes, dislike all open to everybody. An open profile means that the world can see it, not just their invited friends. Do you know whether your child’s Bebo profile is open or private, do you know what information they are even sharing on their profile?

What usually starts as some mutual commenting on Bebo and “sharing the luv” naturally develops into a swapping of Messenger ID’s and then instant chat. I know this because I’ve seen it happen so many times. Of course 99.9% of the time it’s just harmless casual chat amongst real friends but then there’s the time when that isn’t the case. I had my daughter pegged as somebody with oodles of common sense, well beyond her age. That was until the day I came across the report that showed a conversation she’d been having with an 18 year old boy that she’d never met. My daughter’s 12 by the way. What seems like harmless chat to her flags every possible warning sign to me as an adult. She was told in no doubt to remove that contact and never ever chat with them again. This is just one real world example that I know about because I monitor my daughter’s computer usage. I could go on and on about the number of her friends who are as young as 9 and have public Bebo profiles with names like sexygalxx etc etc I wonder if their parents know? This all sounds very alarmist but I don’t see it that way, I just see it as being responsible. If my daughter was playing out in the street I’d like to know who she was playing with, when she is using the computer I see it as part of my duty of care to her to know who she is talking to and more importantly who is trying to talk to her. Leave them to it with the blind faith that all will be OK or monitor, what do you do?

Even the best behaved toddler has an occasional temper tantrum. A tantrum can range from whining and crying to screaming, kicking, hitting, and breath holding. They’re equally common in boys and girls and generally occur from age 1 to age 3.

Some kids may experience regular tantrums, whereas for other kids, tantrums may be rare. Some kids are more prone to throwing a temper tantrum than others.
Toddlers are trying to master the world and when they aren’t able to accomplish a task, they often use one of the only tools at their disposal for venting frustration - a tantrum. There are several basic causes of tantrums that are familiar to parents everywhere: The child is seeking attention or is tired, hungry, or uncomfortable. In addition, tantrums are often the result of kids’s frustration with the world.

Frustration is an unavoidable part of childrens’ lives as they learn how people, objects, and their own bodies work.
Tantrums are common during the second year of life, a time when kids are acquiring language. Toddlers generally understand more than they can express. As language skills improve, tantrums tend to decrease.

Keep off-limits objects out of sight and out of reach, which will make struggles less likely to develop over them. Distract your child. Take advantage of your little one’s short attention span by offering a replacement for the coveted object or beginning a new activity to replace the frustrating or forbidden one. And pick your battles: think about the request carefully when your child wants something. Is it outrageous? Maybe it isn’t. Accommodate when possible to avoid an outburst.

Make sure your child isn’t acting up simply because he or she isn’t getting enough attention. To a child, negative attention (a parent’s response to a tantrum) is better than no attention at all. Try to establish a habit of catching your child being good (”time in”), which means rewarding your little one with attention and praise for positive behaviour. This will teach them that acting appropriately makes mommy and daddy happy and proud, and they’ll be anxious to do it again and again.

Potty training is a stage of child development that many parents dread. Often it is because their own parents pass on tales of woe about their experiences of toilet training. But, things have changed. There is so much knowledge about how children develop that you can put that to your advantage. For stress free toilet training, why not follow a program. Find out more
tips for potty training boys
tips for toilet training boys
potty training boys
The advice applies equally well whether toilet training a little boy or little girl.

One of the best tools for any genealogist is their own genealogy search web site. Not only can you better interact with members of your own family, but who knows what knowledge other genealogists looking at your site will share? There are many ways to make your own free genealogy websites. Here is a quick rundown:

From Scratch

This is not as hard as it sounds, if you are willing to take the time to learn basic HTML, the main dialect of Computerese. There are many free “learn HTML” websites as well as books in the library and your bookstore. You can often set up a framework and add information from other sources – such as from genealogy software that you fill in the blanks – that you can copy and paste into your free genealogy websites. If you have Internet service, you should also have some free Internet space as part of that service.

From Webpage Services

With a little bit of homework, you can find many online companies offering free “build-you-own-webpage” services for genealogy records. You often get a free address, too, so they can send you ads (this is how they can afford to keep it free). Your free genealogy websites will also be framed by ads. There’s nothing you can do about that, if you want to keep your webpage host from charging you every month. Such companies include Xoom.com and TribalPages.com. You do not need to know HTML to use their tools. You can even scan charts and then put them up as image files like JPEGS as a shortcut.

From Blogs

The absolute easiest way of making free genealogy websites is with blog tools, found for free on the internet. The most popular is also the original at Blogger.com. At first, you needed to know a little HTML to really jazz up your free genealogy websites. But recently, Blogger has made things more automatic, so you don’t have to use HTML code to get the look you want, but you can still use HTML if you want.

Blogs are extremely popular partially because they are free. You have the basic template for a webpage and then you add in whatever text or images or links that you want. It is perfectly okay to have more than one blog for different subjects. Depending on the Blog service you use, you can choose to have ads or not. Whatever you choose, free genealogy search websites are a great resource for your family and a great outlet for your creativity.

Baby shower games can be joy-filled and exciting for both the expectant
mom to beand the invitees. The games can be planned around the opening of the unique baby gifts.

Selecting or making prizes should be equally funfor the hostess of the baby shower. Prizes are pretty much up to the hostess to select , and can run from homemade, personalized gifts to store-bought presents . When it comes to selecting the types of prizes that you will use for the baby shower, remember that creativity is critical.

A winning and perfect idea for prizes that will fit anyone’s wallet is a candy baby bottle. For this, all you will require are empty baby bottles, candy, and ribbon. Fill empty baby bottles with jelly beans and M & M’s , close the baby bottle with the top, and add your own decorative touch with ribbon or other accessories, if desired. Don’t be tentative to add your own style to the bottles and personalize them — unique baby gifts are the best ones!

T-shirts can also be personalized and used as presents and/or prizes. You can craft your own T-shirts and have them made for your shower. This makes for a lovable gift and is a wonderful keepsake. T-shirts have recently become very popular for events like baby showers.

Candles and bath items are amongst the most well-liked
prizes for women. Women seem to adore anything and everything that has to do with spa treatments and that relates to indulging themselves. Most women love balmy at your baby shower. Another thing a lot of women cannot live without is chocolate. An attractive box of fine and exquisite chocolates makes an excellent gift that all your invitees will definitely savor.

Gift cards and gift certificates are a recent trend that is a crowd favorite! Generally, major department stores like Sears , Wal- Mart , and Nordstrom are excellent choices for gift cards. Eatery’s and eating establishments, like Olive Garden, T.G.I. Friday’s, and Starbucks are excellent choices , too. Don’t forget about video rental stores and electronic stores like Blockbuster Video and Best Buy; they are top picks among young adults today.

Coffee mugs filled with candy, picture frames, and other household items are popular
among housewives and folks interested in interior design. Stationary kits and personalized journals are practical and simple, and make wonderful presents. Another favorite for women of all ages is a flower arrangement or bouquet.

If you enjoy baking tasty desserts, make homemade candies or brownies and decorate them according to your shower’s colors and theme . Decorate them in a creative and unique way, and don’t forget to personalize them. This idea is simple, convenient, and easy on your wallet , (leaving room for a fantastic baby handprint kit sure to also be the hit of the party).

Prizes make the games and activities more amusing and exciting by promoting a adequate amount of skill, along with motivation and enthusiasm. Gifts and prizes make everyone feel special and proud . Whether you choose to make your gifts or buy them, personalize them and add your special touch. Be fun, be be creative , and most importantly, be you!

After the planning of the party is complete, don’t forget to leave time available for choosing baby gift baskets for the Mom and newborn soon to arrive.

Putting your toddler to bed can sometimes be an exercise in frustration. If you have experienced this, you might want to consider one of the following techniques to make bedtime a peaceful time.

Be consistent about bed times and waking times. Your toddler is more likely to respond positively if he’s used to a specified schedule. The earlier your child’s routine is established, the easier it is to put them to bed without upheaval. Make the activities the same every night, and make the time before bed quiet and peaceful. Whether a parent tells their daughter or son a story, provides a small bedtime snack, puts in a short video, plays quiet games or has soothing classical music on in the background before putting their daughter or son in bed, consistency is the key. A regular bedtime routine is an absolute must.

Avoid the urge lie in bed with your toddler until he falls asleep. This might actually have the opposite effect, and might encourage your child to stay awake, and ask for drinks of water and more bedtime stories. An alternative might be telling your toddler you’re going to complete a chore and that you’ll come back in and check on them in a few moments. It’s most likely that the child will fall asleep while waiting for mom or dad to return. You might also want to talk about your child’s day with them. Keep your tone soft and quiet, and try not to excite your child in the process. Turning this into a nighttime story with your child as the main character is a fun option as well.

As the child grows older, if a consistent bedtime is maintained the task will become easier. The most important issue is consistency and repetition. If the child can expect the same thing every night, and these customary tasks are pleasant, bedtime can become a delightful family ritual. If however, your child is continually resisting sleep, talk with your child’s pediatrician, as their might be a medical problem at the root of it.

It might surprise you but now is the right time to start thinking about potty training. It’s the time to start introducing the words that you will be using in potty training such as wee, poo and, of course, potty. Learn more about the best ways to go about potty training – it does not have to be a stressful experience for either you or your daughter or son.
potty training toddlers
potty training tips
potty training boys